Asking Why

Questions swirled in my head. They wrapped tight around my heart, pulling down, into darkness. My heart beat wildly to break free from the compression as the questions kept twisting around my heart tighter and tighter. 

Why did my husband and I have to lose two babies? Why are my fallopian tubes shredded? Why when others abuse their children can we have no more? Why are You not giving us children when we know You are able? Why?

My throat tightened as tears poured down my cheeks. Would I drown in a wave of unanswered whys? Would my heart actually stop beating from the pressure?

Why? It is a heavy question to ask. But it isn’t wrong to ask. David asks God why many times in the Psalms. Jesus asks God why on the cross. We just have to ask God why for the right reasons and in the right way. How do we ask God why?

• Understand that the answer to your why is not the goal of asking why. God rarely chooses to let us know why this side of heaven. His word tells us that His ways are not ours. Instead the goal of asking why is drawing closer to God.
• When you ask God why, be ready to listen to Him. Often He is there whispering words of gentle correction, encouragement, hope, and truth. You just have to be quiet and still enough to hear Him.
• Remember God’s character. He is trustworthy, faithful, loving, and He has plans for you. Praise God for who He is while you ask Him why. This will remind you the honor due our Lord.
• Accept God’s answer – even if He never answers. Continually rehashing the same question with God over and over again keeps you stuck. Instead allow your whys to develop an intimacy between you and God that could not have happened otherwise.

As I posed my doubts, fears, concerns and whys to my Heavenly Father, the cords around my heart relaxed. I could breathe again. At times I still fight this battle. My whys, doubts and frustrations resurface and I struggle anew. But God is patient. He listens to me. When I ask Him why the right way, God draws me nearer to Him. Perhaps that is why He allows this battle to recur. That I may draw closer to Him.

Are you ready to draw closer to God? Let’s start by asking Him why the right way.

Angela Mackey lives in the Arkansas River Valley with her husband and three children. She desires to honor God in all she does and says. She writes about faith, learning to let God’s word transform your thinking, parenting, infertility, and anything else that comes to her mind. You can connect with her on her blog at www.rethinkingmythinking.com. She is also on twitter www.twitter.com/Rethinkingme and on facebook at www.facebook.com/RethinkingMyThinking.